my thoughts and experience; life has its own healing mechanism

as i'm 'bout to leave office for the day (n weekend) a bit early, due to the sudden plan to visit my 'ol friend mamta in manali over the weekend, i sit beside the system pondering over the thought of the weekend-
"Life does not care about what we want...just about what we need...and that is good",
as mailed to me by the CSC official thought over the weekend.

i dont knw as to its fullness, but yes i've experienced it. still, like an ever-curious and always-experimenting
individual, i try to gather energy over the thought; specially when i'm escaping the home-stay for the weekend. its been quite a good-lot time since i've known the probability of the relationship dat i've recently been wanting to formulate. i've done my bit (n extra as well), but still as i stand on dis day pondering over
the tormented and once-again-broken-heart of mine, i only feel dat mayb this was destiny. it is a lot painful in my state as i'm rite now, and dont know when will it heal; but i know it will, it has to. i do not have the guts to end my life, and neither do i have the energy to make it drunk and spoilt. i have my responsibilities, and i have a li'l soul of hope within me which keeps on pushing, "this too shall pass"; much a soothsayer!

to be true, i always had the knowledge and warning that the one i was interested in was already committed, and the warnings had been given by the one herself. but still, owing to many small and big things, i kept on drawing towards her, and she too was happy wid me and felt secure too. but at the end of the day, she was confused as to whom should be be with, coz the one in her life was there for 2 yrs and had done a lot for her specially when she needed it. so there i was, standing on a tumblesome platform, decided that i had to give her space to choose whom she wants. and so i promised her that i will never force her into any relationship and she was free with her decision but would always be wid her as a good friend (and probably more) as she'd always found me. and ever since such a declaration, my sorrow never ceases; and having tried many so-called solutions i never got the desirede effect. and hence i can say that all this takes is time and space, and also in the course of time, who knows what might happen. Coz even to this day (my weekend was in manali) contact with her has never ceased, and she misses me as much as i do of her, cares/concerns for me in d same fashion. so, widout expecting much, i just do what i shud, being the same for her; leaving everything else on time, space, and god. waiting n watching...